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Bittersweet

This will be our first Christmas without him. It is bittersweet. It had been years since he had been sober on a Christmas Day. He felt such guilt at not being the man he wanted to be for his kids that he would become overwhelmed and drink those terrible feelings into much worse ones. He […]

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If it was toxic for me, it was toxic for him

But what I could not see due to the bubble I had crawled into to try to protect myself, was that if I was in a toxic relationship, SO WAS HE. He was not choosing to live in a toxic place on purpose. Who would do that? He was miserable too. No one actually wants to live that way. This is powerful now, in looking back. It strips away the animosity I have felt about this period of my life.

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