I sat in silence most of today. That is unusual for me. Before my 21 day fast from, well – everything (basically), I had to have NOISE everywhere. I could not abide silence. At all. But, that has changed now. It is one of the many things that has changed in me thanks to my time out/hard reset. I may write in more detail about this experience, but for now, here are some of the fruits in no particular order:
- Silence – As I mentioned above, I love noise. Or I used to. When I was in college I got into the habit of always having the television or music going in the background and I have kept it up ever since. Quiet made me uncomfortable. Part of my fast was to delete all social media and not watch TV for 21 days. I had to learn to live in some quiet. I did play music some, but I found the quiet more and more agreeable. So, now I can sit in quiet in peace. Yay!
- Self-respect/Self-love – Now, I had not lost these things, but I had lost some confidence or maybe just misplaced it. Turns out it is still here. I will always work toward a better me, but I like who I am right now too. And, I will contintue to protect myself the way I would my kids or my BFFs. That is what self-respect is all about. Holding myself to my standards and my convictions in the face of, well, in the face of everything I suppose.
- Deeper connection to Jesus – I wanted this, it is why I started the fast in the first place. I am getting there. I am reading the New Testament and it is helping me reacquaint myself with the man he was and the examples he gave me for mine. I am also praying, addressing Jesus by name. If I want a relationship with him, we should be on a first name basis.
- Prayer – I thought I had a pretty good running conversation going, but let’s just say its been dialed up a notch or two.
- Social Media – Yes, I brought it all back. No, I don’t even look at it every day. I am so much more productive from this one tiny decision. I am painting more and my house is cleaner.
- More productive – I am more motivated to keep my house straight, my clothes washed, spend time with my kids, paint, write, etc. All of it. When I can’t come in and sit in front of the TV I do more before bed. So, I am still limiting my tv watching to just a couple of shows sitting down. Anything else can be in the background while I paint. But, seriously, what are some good podcasts that are not crime related????
- Healthier eating – 21 days of no sugar – Ok, Ill be honest. That 22nd day was most definitely a cheat day. But, I am back off of sugar again. I just feel so much better when I am sugar free. Also, I went without meat for 21 days. I felt just fine without it, but it is harder to eat low carb when I eliminate an entire food group. So, it’s back, but with more veggies. I will be looking for more sources of protein other than meat to incoporate into my diet.
In addition to fasting, I went on a solo weekend retreat to a local abbey where I was able to spend some time in conversaton with one of the sisters and it was very good for my soul. 36 hours of silence – it felt like two weeks. It was so good for me. I hope to go back when it is warmer and I can walk around the grounds in prayer with the sun on my face.