“People tend to become like you treat them or believe them to be.”

– Stephen R. Covey

I cannot begin to tell you how much I LOVE, LOVE this commercial. I was raised in the South, where traditionally, mom stays home with the kids and takes care of the housework and the general raising of the kids. I did this. I stayed home until my youngest went to kindergarten – which was about 12ish years at home with my kids and the albatross of doing it ALL.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  I am thankful beyond measure for my years at home with my kids. I am NOT, however, a great housekeeper, chef, or budget person. I HATE housework. I do it, but I don’t love it.  I was miserable at home. I spent so much time missing the joy of my sweet babies because I knew I “needed” to be home working on the house. Ugh. To get those days back. . .

When I started working, I felt a joy I had never felt before. I am independent, I am contributing to my family in a way I can feel successful.  I never felt successful at housework, at managing our home.  It was hard to feel like a failure so often and it also welled up an embarrassing amount of guilt for wanting to do anything for myself.

I have worked for the past 6 years and it has become more and more apparent that my kids need to be involved in keeping our house a home. In some ways, I feel like we all need to live as if we were roommates, not family, so we learn to fully respect each other’s shared and personal space. My kids need to know how to be good roommates and good steward’s of their time, just as I do.

For the past few weeks I have been texting a chores list to my kids daily so they will know what is expected of them to help get our home in order. Our lives are so busy and so spread out between soccer, football, tumble, etc. that our needs change too often for a chore chart set in stone. So, I evaluate in the morning who is doing what and what needs to be done and spread it out. It is working ok so far – especially since I have a 6th, 9th, and 12th grader.

Any suggestions on how to manage this more effectively? I’m happy to hear your thoughts!